18 posts tagged “advertising”
*WARNING. SCROLL WITH CAUTION SOME IMAGES ARE NSFW*
Way to jump on a trend 5 years after it started NY Times: photographed celebs throw on a T-shirt, appear fresh faced with a look of pognaincy and smug self-satisfaction, urging you to buy a t-shirt to support whatever useless non-profit they donated to.
I have no tolerance or respect for millionaries who throw on a T-shirt and call it activism. Throwing on a T-shirt? I do that shit everyday. Sometimes I even put on a pair of pants. Every couple of days I brush my teeth. I go out there and I do my job which is to organize non union workers, fight the boss, lose sleep, eat shit and then I'm supposed to have Christy Turlington shame me into a buying a pink rubber bracelet?
Ugh you can your donate your mouth to my nuts, Christy (why don't have nuts? that would make that joke so much better!) Ya'll have seen hundreds of the ads I'm talking about. But really none compare to one particular AIDS campaign that made we want to have unprotected sex with multiple partners, roll around in used needles, and blow some Balitmore vagrants rather than donate to their campaign. I present it to thee:
Now I would like to show you some good ads. Creative and terrifying. They deliver their message clearly with the right balance of cheekiness AND gravity.
Old Spice. Rep it! Btw, have you joined the advertising group on vox yet?
Tangential side note: Wilco is some pussy bullshit. ughhhhhhh. Documentaries about bands are nonsense. Millionaires with guitars are fucking boring. This folk emo shit needs some more car crashes and group sex scenes.
Hey! Wanna know a policy issue that Douche Queen and Obama differ on? Blowing people up! Check it:
Cluster bombs and landmines are particularly terrifying weapons that wreak havoc on communities trying to recover from war. They are fatal impediments to reconstruction and rehabilitation of agricultural land; they destroy valuable livestock; they disable otherwise productive members of society; they maim or kill children trying to salvage them for scrap metal.
Over 150 nations have signed the 1997 Mine Ban Treaty. It pains me that our great nation has not. But in the autumn of 2006, there was a chance to take a step in the right direction: Senate Amendment No. 4882, an amendment to a Pentagon appropriations bill that would have banned the use of cluster bombs in civilian areas.
Senator Obama of Illinois voted IN FAVOR of the ban.
Senator Clinton of New York voted AGAINST the ban.
Analysts say Clinton did want to risk appearing "soft on terror," as it would have harmed her electibility.
Hillary = Hawk. Obama = Not. See? Easy. Read more about it by the dude who does Get Your War On!
If that wasn't reason enough to vote for Obama over Clinton, hows about the absolutely beautiful spontaneous/street art/ political posters that the campaign is inspiring? Behold :
pssst... i know I'm kinda Wire obssesed right now, but seriously! "It's a New Day" is totes Carcetti's tag line!! For serious.
I've decided to start digging Obama.
My boy is out of the race and I REFUSE to cast a ballot for the intergalatic douche queen Hillary.
My bearded guru posted this on his site and I dig this because he digs it. It speaks pretty loudly that he, a Jewish Crime policy wonk in his late 40's from the Kennedy School/UCLA up in Baltimore and hasn't owned a TV set since the late 70's is impressed by this (I know, I know I've already talked to him about The Wire. Aside: the entire concept of 'Hamsterdam' owes so much credit to him and his work. He's a smart dude who makes me shy). He's cynical and smart and even he was blown away by this and I have to admit so am I.
Let me ask you, what other candidate's words could be set to music?
I still reserve some hesitation about Obama but sweet christ I hope he gets the nomination.
Also the uh, "street artists" cum corporate hacks OBEY have endorsed Obama. In general, I hope these blowjobs get splashed (thank you Ryan) when some "street team" member plasters their posters on Fairfax ave, but I will say this graphic is pretty fucking sweet.
* HANDS OFF, WENCH!: Hillary uses the Sopranos &
Journey, as tools to build her empire of LIES
* "The foxes have a sincere interest in prolonging
the life of the poultry": The Best Political Print Ad
I'll be honest. I've felt the paralyzing humiliation of having my wrists dug into a sticky linoleum floor while I steady my forehead against a grimy toilet seat. My knees bruised from pressure, my stomach tight from heaving, my frail dignity seeping out my mouth with each gag.
And I've also felt the shame infused with a small sense of pride when I told people about it the next day. Some of my most riveting stories involve, me, a cellphone, 5 shots of a dubious brown liquid, and a lowered sense of inhibition that would make Jenna Jameson blush.
The last thing I need in moments like this is the fucking government. Let alone a government paid funded g-string.
1. Is it me? Or is this picture (above) somewhat arousing? Hands and knees, slender body, cute though yeast worthy underwear. Honestly, who doesn't love a drunk slutty chick? Isn't that why most people drink anyways? To find the drunk slut or to get away with acting like a drunk slut? Any one who has taken a shot of Patron *shudder* with me knows that after about 10 mins I ask the bar tender where all the "loose women is at"?!
2. This whole slouched in the corner, hung over junkie look (above) that took courtney love YEARS to perfect, is once again too chic to be taken seriously! How many countless fashion ads have we seen with this type of pillowy pouty lips, legs parted, mascara running, aloof look? Exhibit A:
4. When I get wasted my face is puffy and lined, my clothes are sweat drenched, my eyes are crossed, and my shoes are FAR MORE SENSIBLE!
5. "I'll sober up when I'm behind the wheel" would actually make a pretty funny t-shirt. Unless some one you love was killed my a drunk driver, in which case why would are drinking and puking anyways? And if you're not, kudos to feeling smug while you piss in a public toilet.
thankee to copyranter
related:
* Terrifying Face Melting PSA: Dude, Canada! Not Cool!
* Annals of Awful Advertising: In an Absolut World Your Vag Tastes Like Lemons
How great is this design?
And look!
She has a briefcase full of "sanitary napkins" which she is proudly displaying. Like this bitch doesn't need a blanket or laser to travel through time/space/Park Slope all she needs is a big fucking suit case filled with things to soak up her menstrual blood. Awesome.
While I'm not crazy about the whole deodorant thing --for any one who has used scented pads you know that it just makes your crotch smell like bloody old flowers -- I do like the final closing point which really captures the disillusioned cynicism of the kooky go-go 1970's as women's heads were collectively hitting the glimmering glass ceiling of patriarchy. :
"...Now that reassuring napkin-within-a-napkin has its own feminine deodorant built right in. Most encouraging news of the month."
HA! Take that Jimmy Carter!
I'm sure that this Modern Female Time Traveler's deodorized napkins smell like jet fuel and power.
*Check out the Museum of Menstruation!
*Thankee to jezebel
What else could this possibly be?
With its folding layers of O'Keefe-stlyle labias and flabias, its blood engorged lemon clit, and distinctive oval shape, this can be nothing else but a giant, vodka soaked cat-bag.
Once again, with the vag hate. This whole " your vagina (heh) is a smelly, excavation pit that could swallow 660,340 gallons of pool water " thing that advertisers jump on is offensive on it's own. But you mean to tell me that some Lysol infused booze that tastes like citrus and asshole tastes better than my vagina?
Are you serious? MY VAGINA TASTES LIKE A FUCKING SNOWFLAKE. ORPHANS COULD EAT OFF MY VAGINA.
Regardless, even if my cat-bag tasted like the roof of a junkie's mouth after a 4 day bender on the streets of Baltimore, it still could not taste worse than Citron.
The worst part is that this ad isn't even directed at men. This isn't your average "Hey doesn't it suck that your girlfriend's snatch smells like fish?" (two words people BALL SWEAT. why are there no ads about ball sweat! ugh apply that ball sweat directly to your forehead). No, this is directed at all those Carrie-SADshaw swilling ladies out their who like their booze fruity and their men Israeli. This is saying "Hey, wouldn't it be great if your vag naturally tasted like lemons."
The lemon flavor is key point here. It's not advertising the taste/smell of flowers, rain, or unicorn fur it is SPECIFICALLY an ANTI-SEPTIC scent. As in your vagina = smelly septic tank that needs to be DISINFECTED.
Sorry Citron, I only douche with top shelf booze.
*thankee to copyranter.
Well, well, well. Nicely played, Democrats. Chuck Norris was pretty sweet and all but this is damn clever, cutting, and pretty. Glad they finally hired some decent PR staff. Now if they could convince me that Harry Reid wasn't a sniveling opportunistic tool or that Hillary Clinton was not a duplicitous lying sea hag. Regardless, snaps.
Double true
Picture what the "creative meeting" was like for this brand of junior panties ?
Who we're the brilliant marketing minds that believe it's acceptable for young girls to wear panties that endorse the notion of your vagina being used as a bargaining chip?
How big was the shit eating grin of the over-paid hack that finally came up with the final product?:
What were the rough drafts?
"Can't touch this without cash."
"Who needs a savings account when you have a camel toe?"
"You'll have to pay my pimp first"
"I am not worried about fiscal responsibility because I have a vagina which allows me to entrance men to buy material goods for me"
"Ain't too young to trick"
"Hot Pocket"
Way to uphold them family values Sam Fam.
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